Blogland Lane Logo by our own Tessa Edwards

Monday, July 5, 2010

The S.S. Me

For Sunday Scribbles


I am the S.S. Me - the Steam Ship Me - pushing full speed ahead. My speed is controlled by the power of the coal, the fuel, that I stoke within myself. Yes, I power myself. It is just me that I rely on for the progress that i make.

Work life is a box, a lifetime box that we are all bound in. When I reflect on the me that was, I am not surprised that a lifetime of answering other peoples' demands makes the entrance into retirement so difficult. No matter how prepared I thought I was, I wasn't even close. Oh, sure, the S.S. Me had a direction but it was out there, that-a-way. Or, as Peter Pan said, "Take the first star on the right and go on straight on til morning".

What is the path? Where is it taking me? In fact, what ARE THESE paths? The possibilities are infinite. Each new discovery, step, accomplishment, takes me somewhere else. And then, suddenly I slow, fuel expended and I rest, taking a look around. Where have i landed?

I assess the rocky moments, those moments when the walls of the box I lived in for so long, made the passage harder than it needed to be. Me, I made it harder. I am responsible. Ahead of me now, beyond the rocks I stand upon, is the sweeping beach running north and south and before me is the vast ocean of possibilities. I step forward. A choice can be made. The world awaits. The wind sweeps me up.

2 comments:

  1. Loved the picture. Entering retirement is a challenge but a good one when you are fully in command to do what you want. Hope you enjoy it.

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  2. aw, annie, i'm sorry i've taken so long to read this wonderful post. and i understand totally. it is a lonely place to fill open space, and it takes time. i think life is best lived when there is a certain rhythm to it, and starting new means that you have to listen before you know how to move.

    that will come.

    i'm reminded of this: 'put yourself where you want to be'

    love
    kj

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